Contentment & Satisfaction

I feel like locking myself in my room, shutting out the outside world and immersing myself into reading and playing guitar. I feel like being alone. Just writing on my journal, creating new masterpieces only for self-satisfaction.

I can say that the urge to be a loner occurs from time to time. I'm just worried the need for alone time will become more frequent and that it will be casting a shadow onto learning new lessons which may only come from being outside, being involved, and being out there.

It's February. Already February. I had a conversation with Jenny not too long ago and I told her of the things I've been up to. It doesn't surprise me anymore that I tend to tell her every detail of everything. She asked why I haven't been out that much, which for some reason offended me the tiniest bit possible for I think I've been quite content with my reading and staying home. Other than that, I've been tutoring juniors and hanging out with friends from time to time, and I've signed up for driving lessons, which to me is already a bit much to fit into my schedule. Which is a bit funny because I think I'm actually schedule-less.

I can't go out much and experience the whole damn freaking world because I guess I have some setbacks - no licence, no car, not much money, all my friends are working. I guess I could arrange something someday, maybe I'd ask the ones who are not working to join me in a new experience. I've been meaning to volunteer somewhere but I haven't picked out a place and I'm trying to find that one thing that could make my time worthwhile. Maybe more than one thing.

I'm surprised that I enjoy tutoring. Some need help with homework and such and I think I've been more enthusiastic learning the SPM syllabus now than before. Maybe it's because now I learn or teach for fun and don't have to be pressured by the idea of exams. It is a bit freeing.

But I need more things to do, get out more. I hate to say it but Jenny always seems to be right.